What Sticky Says

Inquiry to self on a regular Wednesday evening: What am I doing outside past dark? The stars are so bright and the air is cool but I have other pressing issues to tend to other than wandering around the yard admiring my new miniature gargoyle, and talking to stupid tree frogs.

With only an hour until bedtime, this is nonsense.

Meet Sticky. We cross paths every night. He makes me smile.

Ms. Mary, you should get yourself inside and get blogging and Facebooking instead of talking to us stupid tree frogs. I heard you say stupid, you know.

But, but, but I discovered newer, easier ways to relax this summer, Sticky. An hour or two to spare is better spent lounging with my feet up instead of sorting through hundreds of photos or working on the blog, stupid frog. Shut the hell up and hold still for the camera while I elaborate a tad about the Lifetime channel. Lifetime on Sunday afternoons. Ahhhh… escape with the love, the lust, the mystery. I could sniffle the day away sometimes.

Let me tell you about my head-over-heels new love. HGTV.

I quit smoking eight months ago, gave up cookies, potato chips, and wine, but I can’t shake HGTV.

Property Virgins!
House Hunters!
Bang for Your Buck!
Beyond the Box!
Pure Design!
Income Property (includes h-h-hot Scott)!
Extreme Living!
Curb Appeal!
Design on a Dime!

It is reality TV at its finest, for me. From HGTV I learned we need more hardwood floors. Our home absolutely deserves more shiny hardwood and nice tile and it’s coming next week. Seriously. Cha-ching.

Staring at a TV is ecstatically easy and lazy.

We bloggers give so much for free.

We give up HGTV!

You are lame, lame, lame. Shame, shame on you.

I know, I know, I know. Sticky, shut up and be still. Let me take your picture and I’ll save it with a few hundred others that are screaming to be seen, little stupid frog. And I’ll tell you what’s lame…

Some of those HGTV people are odd, materialistic, and they make no sense. Most of them would rather die than to live with laminate kitchen countertops instead of granite. Laminate should NOT be a deal breaker!

They all say,

"This is a great space.
I like this space.
This space has potential.
This is perfect adult space."

Stop.

Whaaaaat? What’s adult space? In my lifetime, the only space in a house where an adult might be able to escape from children and pets is called the “bathroom”. Yep, on the crapper is where you’ll find me...

Give me strength.

With cameras rolling inside a fabbo $900,000 home, a real estate agent listens to a young couple critique the size of a multi-media space (formerly called a TV room or family room). How dare they criticize the size of a “space” in an 8,000 square foot house wherein the master suite bedroom closet is twice the size of my family room. Do two people really deserve to take up that much space in this world? Perhaps I’m just a little bit jealous.

So, what do ya say, Sticky? Let's call it a night.

Alright. You’re boring me and I'm sleepy.

Yeah, me too. Outta here. House Hunters in five minutes!

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OMG, I wrote that. I’ve reached a new low… Out of practice, I guess.

I wish to redeem myself with two of my personal best photographs taken yesterday.

The summer has been mild and we could benefit from a few good rain showers. Since May I’ve been short on energy and time but I have made it a priority to find time to spend with my Fuji.

I have a lovely summer gallery to share –

Hopefully, before the trees are bare.

Hummingbird photos taken on my day off. I rarely see the sun rising on my green gems.