My Office Tantrum and Following Bluebirds

If you have ever worked in an office, you know the type. The lackluster, sloth-type office worker who slinks into the copy room to make a copy on the last sheet of paper in the building. And, that last piece of paper folds inside the machine, accordion-style, sending the machine into an array of red flashing lights and a display on the LCD on “how to” clear a paper jam, step by step.

Instead of clearing the jam or asking for help, the sloth scratches his head and chest, makes an about-face, and quietly disappears down the hallway, leaving a fart behind. Maybe you don’t have a sloth on your staff, but you might have a candy bandit – you know, the guy who bores you with happy small talk while he fills his pockets with the Dove chocolates you generously offer in a pretty candy dish on the corner of your desk. I’ve been tempted to raise my 12-inch ruler and crack some knuckles.

Now, I’m not being gender specific here. I’ve seen many ladies who are way too important and busy to mess with the last piece of paper crinkled inside a copy machine. Those are the ladies I’d like to trip on their way out the door and ask, “Did you forget something, honey? Need a Jam lesson?” They never fill their pockets with chocolates when they are being watched. They prefer to steal a few pieces when no one is looking.

Monday, December 8, 7:15 a.m. I was the only person in the office and I needed one quick copy. Already, you know what happened. No paper to be found and a damned jam in the machine. Someone walked away from a mess on Friday.

I’m used to it. I usually roll my eyes, fix the jam and place an order for an urgent paper delivery. On this Monday morning, however, my frustration level spiked because there was no one to hear my little tantrum. I was not nice. During my hissing fit, I scribbled this,

attached a piece of Scotch tape to it, and SLAMMED it onto the wall above the copy machine. Hmmpf.

An option: Make a copy on the fax machine. Good. What happened? It jammed. Why?

See the staple on the top left corner of the pack of paper? What imbecile loaded the paper tray with a short stack of stapled paper? Huh?

Time spent trying to make one lousy copy with no success: 20 minutes.
After a cool down, I found humor in what I did and took the photos… I’m not proud but I want to share with fellow office workers or anyone who might have had a fit in the copy room.

An hour after my meltdown, a friend saved me from possible inter-office conflicts. He removed my two carelessly written nastygrams before anyone read them and found a ream of paper tucked away in someone’s office. This is why we need friends. They can save our miserable selves.

A few hours later, I left the building to find a small flock of Eastern Bluebirds I had seen near the parking lot. Getting photos didn’t matter. I just wanted to see them.

For what it’s worth, that’s my car on the left.

My high heels were sinking in a few inches of pine straw but I didn’t care…

There was a male bluebird in this photo. He escaped but the photo wasn’t a total loss because I think that’s a Brown Headed Nuthatch bottom.

Here’s a poor photo that needed a little editing,

as I needed, on Monday :o)

Make it a grand weekend!