MigRANT

Susan said, “It's a thrilling time, with a freshly arrived migrant around every corner, or a sleepy overwintered butterfly." Yay, Susan! She must be kidding or I must be living in another world.

What migrants? Where are the migrants? Maybe I need my eyes examined, or, they all conspired to pack it up for the night after I get home from work. Last spring I had a male Rose-breasted Grosbeak for two days and that’s it! When I read her post last night I gritted my teeth and felt a rant coming on.

Spring isn't good here. Perhaps it's because we're in a subdivision fairly young in years - eight at the most, or I'm too far from heavily wooded areas. I don't know. Every day I read e-mails from the county Audubon listserve from many tickled pink backyard bird watchers boasting about the array of birds in their backyards which, by the way, must be located at the edge of a nature preserve. Typically reported this week: Red-eyed Vireo, Indigo Bunting, Scarlet Tanager, Veery, Black-Throated Blue Warbler (whaaaat????), Peeping Yellow Rump, Tennessee Warbler, Nashville Warbler, Orchard Oriole, Eastern Wood Pee-Wee, blah blah blah. All lifers for me. So, I held my head high and went to the grocery store today.

What a stupid thing to do. We don’t even eat jelly around here. How’s an oriole going to lap it up if they don’t stop at my buffet?

And then there’s Sherry in Missouri, the backyard bird goddess in a wide-brimmed hat who sashays around her yard every day spooning out the jelly, serving oranges, rotten bananas, frozen or fresh berries in pretty little plates for the migrants who tell all their friends and family she’s the best deal in town. They land on the brim of her hat.

Meanwhile, I’m feeding Brown-headed Cowbirds, Mourning Doves, etcetera.

Mourning Doves are cute. The way they do that little head-bobbing thing while they waddle along is very endearing. But they sit and eat and sit and eat and sit and eat. A dozen of them, sitting and eating. Aaaaack.

Jayne in Georgia is another one that makes my eyes roll because every day she has a surprise visitor. For instance, a Summer Tanager perches on her deck, right in front of her kitchen sink. She grabs her camera and in one snapshot, “Oh, my, that’s a perfect shot on the first try! Lovely close-up! I must post this one!” Only Jayne is blessed enough to witness baby Bluebirds fledging, shown in stunning photos.

At Mary's View,

I exclaim, “Oh, my, look at those beautiful shades of blue, purple, and teal! Can’t wait to post a pigeon!”

Just look at the bottom bin in my refrigerator where a month’s supply of Zick dough awaits for my ordinary flocks. Add the oranges, grapes, suet cakes, shelled nuts, niger and black oil sunflower seeds, worms, maybe grape jelly, and I might as well go out and purchase a small picnic table and set up a real buffet complete with new ceramic plates and spoons for the pretty birds. Starlings and Grackles would freak out and cause a food fight.

I’ve wanted to pick up a broom to beat the living hell out of a Starling a few times when I see them dive and crash into a Chickadee and a Carolina Wren in a mad rush for the worms. I haven't seen or heard a Carolina Wren in two weeks and I miss them.

Oh, and I can’t forget Ruthie in Minnesota who will be having hummingbirds and Chickadees eating out of her hand soon. All the while, she’ll be giggling and thinking, “Mary’s gonna blow a fuse about this.” Tee-hee. Ha Ha.

Well.

Whew.

My rant is over.

I calmed down this evening.

I still have two crazy Cuckoos that make me smile

and keep me running for hula hoops.

Sleepy, overwintered moth? Whatever. Blends nicely in the cedar. But I want a Scarlet Tanager. A Baltimore Oriole would be nice, too.

Dammit. ;-)